Ridiculousness

So this NYT writer decided he wanted to make a list of 100 things no food server should ever do. While some of these are good tips, and some are pretty obvious to anyone with a pulse, the rest are just RIDICULOUS!!! This writer either has NEVER worked in a restaurant—or did so about 30 years ago.

I am only commenting on the ridiculous ones! This list can be found in its entirety here

8. Do not interrupt a conversation. For any reason. Especially not to recite specials. Wait for the right moment.
- Um, yeah in a perfect world I do not have 6 tables to worry about who all need something. If your server approaches your table, you should give THEM your full attention. Not ignore them.

11. Do not hustle the lobsters. That is, do not say, “We only have two lobsters left.” Even if there are only two lobsters left.
-Ok, if there are only 2 of something left, I would like to know this, so I can tell the waiter, oh please make sure I get one. I don’t want to find out they are out of it simply because I spent my sweet time ordering.

23. If someone likes a wine, steam the label off the bottle and give it to the guest with the bill. It has the year, the vintner, the importer, etc.
-Ok, THIS is the reason I am writing this. The list did not seem all that ridiculous until this one. Like your server has time to steam off the bottle label???? Has this EVER happened to ANYONE??? If you want the information, write it down!

27. For red wine, ask if the guests want to pour their own or prefer the waiter to pour.
-What? My waiter should be constantly making sure my glass has wine in it. And it’s hard to keep track of 6 tables without remembering which ones want to self pour. If you want to self pour, TELL the waiter, or just DO IT.

30. Never let the wine bottle touch the glass into which you are pouring. No one wants to drink the dust or dirt from the bottle.
-Ok, the waiter should make sure the bottle does not have dust or dirt on it before taking it to the table!!! And there shouldn’t be dust or dirt under the foil, if there is, the waiter should wipe it before pouring.

33. Do not bang into chairs or tables when passing by.
-Excuse me? I’m sorry, either the waiter is doing it ON PURPOSE, in which case they are a jerk, or ON ACCIDENT which means it could not be avoided! This is just idiotic.

39. Do not call a woman “lady.”
-Well, the term is “ladies and gentlemen.” What should the waiter say??? Female??

42. Do not compliment a guest’s attire or hairdo or makeup. You are insulting someone else.
- Huh? By NOT complimenting everyone at the table? It's this kind of logic that LSAT question writers relish.

Stay tuned for the next 50 which come out next week! Eeek!

Recession Hits Home!

I can't BELIEVE that Conde Nast is shuttering Gourmet magazine. I almost want to cry. Gourmet is hands down my favorite food magazine! Bon Appetit is just not an adequate substitute. :-( Waaaah! And I LOVE Ruth Reichl. Sadness!

Read all about it on Yahoo!

Jax Fish House Boulder

Dina enjoying a glass of wine in Jax's cool dining room

Wow. I cannot beLIEVE I have not updated the blog since November. Shame on me. Perhaps it is because nobody reads this so what is the point? BUT I do have about 2,000 hits, and that can’t be just from people I know. Plus, this last year of working and paying student loans has been culinarily uninspiring, especially since I have been trying to save money! But, let’s face it, I just love food too much. AND I was inspired by Julie and Julia. I actually have a lot in common with Julia Child, it was quite funny. But okay, onto the review!

My coworkers and I had to go to Boulder for training. As a fan of Top Chef , I immediately decreed we would have to go to Jax Fish House, since last season’s winner, Hosea, is the executive chef there. He was not there, but some people think that means the food is better. (Read the review to see if I agree).

The menu at Jax







Delicious oysters!

We started off with some divine Hama Hama oysters. That doesn’t really involve cooking, just the ability to get good oysters, but I was pleased. They were small, plump, and fresh, tasting like the Pacific Ocean.




Skillet cornbread

We also had this DIVINE skillet cornbread with honey butter. I just love cast iron skillets. It’s the best way to brown a chop and the best way to make cornbread. And what is cornbread without honey butter? I think that is why I don’t like jalapeno cornbread. It doesn’t go well with honey butter. Oh yeah, and I hate jalapenos. Ha!


We also ordered the Maryland blue crab cakes which came with a spicy creamy tobiko-horseradish sauce. The crab cakes were great, full of chunks of crab, and not too bready. I just took a lil bit of the sauce since horseradish overwhelms my palate.




Maryland Blue Crab Cakes





Sauvignon Blanc






My pretty but crappy scallops

Now of course, there were New Bedford sea scallops on the menu with crispy prosciutto, spring peas, and morel bread pudding, so I HAD to order it. Dina is also a huge fan of any kind of bread pudding, savory or sweet, so she ordered it too. It looked amazing, but the execution was poor to say the least. The prosciutto was good, but there was only one little square. The scallops were acceptable, they were about 5 seconds undercooked, but that was forgiveable. Sadly, what should have been the piece de resistance, the bread pudding was not good at all. And the mushy sauce under it did NOTHING for the dish. It was kind of like baby food (or what I imagine baby food would taste like haha), it was mushy and lacking in flavor. The morels in the bread pudding were sandy, and the pudding itself was bland. The spring peas on the side were crispy and fresh, but WAY too salty. I think all the salt that should have gone into the bread pudding went on the vegetables. It was a sad little plate in the end. At least I had this beautiful Sauvignon Blanc (picked by Renita) to drink and dull my pain. I just don’t understand how the morel bread pudding was so awful, especially since it’s offered as a side on the menu.




Dale's amazing lamb duo

Unfortunately everyone else chose really good dishes! (Well, I guess fortunate for them). Dale got the Colorado Lamb Duo which was AMAZING. I was super jealous and wished I ordered it. It came with a loin chop & a braised shoulder, polenta, rapini and gremolata. The shoulder fell right off the bone and the loin chop was perfectly cooked. I guess when you go to a fish house you shouldn’t order fish??






A rethinking of a classic nicoise

Then there was the seared Ahi with grilled romaine, olives, quail egg, potato, and caper dressing. It just screams nicoise (which I LOVE) and it was super tasty.

And to top it all off…. Mystery fish!!! I don’t remember exactly what this was, but it had to have been better than my scallops.




Mystery fish!




Fun with crayons at Jax




The Boulder Crew! Christine, Dale, Me, Dina, Renita, David

All in all, Boulder is a great town (my almost husband is from there). And I did go back to Jax for their $1 happy hour oysters. Overall the food was very good, albeit pricey for Boulder. Whatever you do, stay away from the morel bread pudding and scallops!!! And if you EVER see Hosea there, tell him to get out of the kitchen.